bothers me.

There are patterns in primes.  I believe as our perspective evolves we will be able to recognize more patterns.

If mankind were born with 8 fingers instead of 10 we'd count in 8s like 16, 24, 32, 40 instead of 10s like 10, 20, 30, 40.

Last night I was on a drawing streak so I slept at work afraid that if I went home I'd re-enter my routine and lose some of my new found creativity.

What I'm becoming


What I'd much rather be

Bought an Elliot Smith CD a week ago and I can't stop listening to it.  Its really mellow and nice.  When I'm working on customers I think its way more soothing to listen to than rock (like we usually do).  

Growing my hair out while simultaniously going bald.  A customers from over two years ago didn't recognize me yesterday.  Said she got work done by an artist who had the same exact tattoos that I did but it wasn't me "was it?"

Folks say I've gained weight.  The scale says I've lost weight since Denver so maybe its just my head that got fatter. 

My girlfriend makes fun of me for taking small steps like an old man and counting out change when others would rather have their dollar broken.  We made a deposit on a small house.  We move in this September.  I'm buying her car.  Hopefully I'll have a license by then.

Only bartenders and barbers should wear bow ties to work.  

Euphoric recall: a process secondary to denial in which the user remembers only the good or pleasant aspects.

As exciting as runny noses, waking nightmares, forgetting how to talk, suicidal mood swings, violent heart palpitations,  throwing up, hooking up with strangers, drinking Nyquil so I can sleep, and generally looking like an ass in public may be I think its probably better if I just maintain my sobriety... however boring it may be.

Me: Can we stop into that Circle K?

Her:  I was just about to pull into there.  What were you getting?  A money order for supplies

Me: Yeah.

Her:  Could you get me a vitamin water?

Me:  Wouldn't you rather have a Naked Juice?

Her: Oh yeah!  If they have it.
_____________________________________

Her: We should go to a strip club!

Me: I don't think so.  I work too hard for my money to just give it to a stripper. Besides-

Her: Hold on I love the intro to this song!  [turns up the stereo]

Me: [waits till the intro is over so I can talk again]

Intro is over

Her: Wasn't that awesome?  I love these guys so much!  I'm sorry.  Were you about to tell me that taking me to a strip club was like 'taking a sports car to a used car lot?' or how its like drinking a knock off brand soda or something?

Me:... yeah.... the used car one.

Her:  Cool.  I don't feel so bad for interrupting you.

Something happened where my mood soured and suddenly I don't want to compete in this upcoming convention.  I've already paid for the booth but today, like a switch I became depressed.  I thought about the man running the convention and how he reminds me too much of my old boss.  Swell guy, I'm sure, just too swell for me.  Come to think of it, there's a lot of people there I'm not in a big hurry to be around.  On top of that there's just an awful feeling I get when I think about the whole affair and I don't want to go anymore.  Its the same feeling I felt before my high school graduation and prom.  I spent both occasions cutting pizzas instead.

God I know its a phase and I have to truck through it.  Go through motions.  Jump through hoops.  I want to back out but I won't.  I'm just going to go through with this.  I can't drink anymore but I won't let that stop me from acting like a dick and picking a fight.  I feel better already.

Current Mood: angrydepressedpointless
I'm Listening to: We Used to be Friends

This month I found out one of my tattoos was featured in this April's International Tattoo Magazine.  It felt good to think that my people in the industry who knew me and hated me might have seen it.  I just submitted a bunch of photos to FLASH magazine.  I like having my work published.

Throw as many shoes as you want, Canada, your government is just as impotent at fighting Bush as ours was.  And when he leaves your country your government will apologize kiss all of your knuckles for forgiveness and say "yes, yes you're absolutely right, we should have done something but he's gone now and there's nothing we can do."  and you'll buy it and accept it cause there's nothing else you can do.  You can keep hating Americans which seems to be in vogue, but just  not too loudly lest someone over hear and remind you how you had laws against allowing war criminals into your country and instead of acting on them, you wrote angry letters fed him Italian food and charged $400 a pop to listen to him speak.  

God bless the four who were arrested at the protest.

I can't help but feel that once fusion power becomes available some under developed group of zealots will try to destroy it not to be evil but to add strength to whatever dying culture and value system they subscribe to.  Those who follow the rhetoric of zealous leaders would be wise to remember that theirs are no different than every leader who has ever lived: they only want to control you. 

While walking to work I saw a segway gang on the street.

they die a little.

Lately I can't help but look at others like I have x-ray vision.  Humanity hasn't seemed so disgusting to me since I was a teenager.

Being older, I hope that I can now reflect to find the root of my problem doesn't stem from others but is within myself instead.

I can't stop looking at this.



I just bought Oblivion for the third time in my life today.  I've beaten it inside and out but still, its a game I can not not own.  Its the principle:  If I love a game I should own it no matter how many times it gets lost scratched lifted and ultimately replaced.  In return I hope Bethesda has the decency to create a slick-as-snot sequel.

These days I'm not so much concerned about the subject matter as I am with technique. With style and technique a skilled artist can paint roses dripping with more macabre than a pile of baby skulls. An artist can paint a bowl of onions in a dark room but its the atmosphere and mood of the morning air that is actually being expressed.

Its nothing but thinly disguised commercial for a hundred different products.

(I have this creeping feeling) the world is un-apologetically erasing me from existence.

No explanation.

No phone call.

Just an absentee breakup.

I am a fool
I am a ghost


Blue Lava Lamp by ~johnnyjinx on deviantART

I'm Listening to: In Rainbows

Today on the internet I learned that the oldest computer is a little over two thousand years old and is called an antikythera. As the most brilliant testament to mankind's genius, I believe it to be more valuable than any other artifact.  Seeing it reminded me of Mechanus which made me miss Planescape which is why I am callnig out to the internet gods to PLEASE MAKE A PLANESCAPE SEQUEL!!!  Preferably for my Xbox 360.

If Bethesday made a next gen platform version with a grip full of expansion disks for each of the outer planes it would be stupid mad fun and I'd gladly pay hundreds of dollars for them.  Seriously.  My gaming gland is in full throb just thinking about it!